1 00:00:35,161 --> 00:00:38,706 Once upon a time, there was a glowing city protected by golden gates 2 00:00:38,706 --> 00:00:40,541 known as Heaven. 3 00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:43,544 It was ruled by beings of pure light. 4 00:00:43,544 --> 00:00:47,089 Angels that worshipped good and shielded all from evil. 5 00:00:47,631 --> 00:00:50,426 Lucifer was one of these angels. 6 00:00:50,426 --> 00:00:54,805 He was a dreamer with fantastical ideas for all of creation. 7 00:00:54,805 --> 00:00:57,850 But he was seen as a troublemaker by the elders of Heaven. 8 00:00:57,850 --> 00:01:02,563 For they felt his way of thinking was dangerous to the order of their world. 9 00:01:02,563 --> 00:01:07,276 So he watched as the angels began to expand the universe in their ways. 10 00:01:07,276 --> 00:01:11,697 From the dust of Earth, they created Adam and Lilith. 11 00:01:11,697 --> 00:01:14,784 Equals as the first of mankind, but despite this, 12 00:01:14,784 --> 00:01:19,413 Adam demanded control and Lilith refused to submit to his will. 13 00:01:19,413 --> 00:01:20,498 She fled the garden. 14 00:01:21,582 --> 00:01:23,292 Drawn in by her fierce independence, 15 00:01:23,292 --> 00:01:29,298 Lucifer found her and the two rebellious dreamers fell deeply in love. 16 00:01:29,298 --> 00:01:33,803 Together, they wished to share the magic of free will with humanity, 17 00:01:33,803 --> 00:01:38,599 offering the fruit of knowledge to Adam's new bride, Eve, who gladly accepted. 18 00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:41,477 But this gift came with a curse. [sinister music] 19 00:01:41,477 --> 00:01:46,190 For with this single act of disobedience, evil finally found its way into Earth. 20 00:01:46,190 --> 00:01:49,360 With it, a new realm of darkness and sin. 21 00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:52,446 And the order Heaven had worked to maintain was shattered. 22 00:01:53,197 --> 00:01:55,574 As punishment for their reckless act, 23 00:01:55,574 --> 00:01:59,537 Heaven cast Lucifer and his love into the dark pit he had created, 24 00:01:59,537 --> 00:02:02,832 never allowing him to see the good that came from humanity, 25 00:02:03,457 --> 00:02:05,751 only the cruel and the wicked. 26 00:02:05,751 --> 00:02:09,255 Ashamed, Lucifer lost his will to dream. 27 00:02:09,505 --> 00:02:13,551 But Lilith thrived, empowering demon-kind with her voice 28 00:02:13,551 --> 00:02:16,554 and her songs. And as the numbers of Hell grew, 29 00:02:16,554 --> 00:02:18,138 so did its power. 30 00:02:18,889 --> 00:02:23,811 Threatened by this, Heaven made a truly heartless decision. 31 00:02:24,311 --> 00:02:27,356 That every year, they would send down an army, 32 00:02:27,356 --> 00:02:32,611 an extermination to ensure Hell and its sinners could never rise against them. 33 00:02:34,321 --> 00:02:36,365 But Lilith's hope remained. 34 00:02:36,365 --> 00:02:39,368 And her dream was passed down to their precious daughter 35 00:02:39,368 --> 00:02:42,288 the Princess of Hell. 36 00:02:44,206 --> 00:02:46,750 Don't worry, Mom. I'll make you proud. 37 00:02:47,960 --> 00:02:49,587 {\an8}Charlie? 38 00:02:49,587 --> 00:02:51,630 {\an8}Augh! Oh, shit. Did you hear all that? 39 00:02:51,630 --> 00:02:53,757 {\an8}Uh... Yeah, I was right there. 40 00:02:53,757 --> 00:02:58,470 {\an8}Sorry. I get pretty worked up after an extermination happens. 41 00:02:58,721 --> 00:03:00,681 This story helps. 42 00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:03,851 I know. Don't worry. I enjoy your theatrics. 43 00:03:03,851 --> 00:03:05,644 Are you okay? 44 00:03:05,644 --> 00:03:08,606 I'm fine, just-- thinking ya know, family stuff. 45 00:03:08,606 --> 00:03:10,900 {\an8}Did you hear from your mom yet? 46 00:03:12,484 --> 00:03:14,570 {\an8}Oof. How long has it been now? 47 00:03:14,570 --> 00:03:18,908 {\an8}Not that long, only... seven... years... 48 00:03:18,908 --> 00:03:21,952 Off doing something important, I'm sure. 49 00:03:21,952 --> 00:03:24,914 But this kingdom was something she really cared about. 50 00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:26,749 Something I care about. 51 00:03:26,749 --> 00:03:29,335 Well, at least you aren't alone. 52 00:03:29,335 --> 00:03:31,962 I just hope what I'm trying to do here will work. 53 00:03:31,962 --> 00:03:34,924 It will. I have faith in you. 54 00:03:35,466 --> 00:03:37,259 All right. Come on. 55 00:03:37,259 --> 00:03:38,677 Alastor says he has something to show us. 56 00:03:45,935 --> 00:03:48,437 Well, hello there you wayward sinner. 57 00:03:48,437 --> 00:03:51,565 Do you like blood, violence and depravity of a sexual nature? 58 00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:54,276 Of course you do. That's why you're in Hell! 59 00:03:54,276 --> 00:03:56,737 But what would you say 60 00:03:56,737 --> 00:03:59,281 there was a place to stay that had none of that? 61 00:03:59,281 --> 00:04:01,784 Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel, 62 00:04:01,784 --> 00:04:03,786 a misguided path to redemption! 63 00:04:03,786 --> 00:04:06,497 Founded five days ago by Lucifer's delusional daughter 64 00:04:06,497 --> 00:04:08,832 Charlotte Morningstar! 65 00:04:08,832 --> 00:04:11,627 Come place your fate in her inexperienced hands 66 00:04:11,627 --> 00:04:15,047 as she tries to work through her daddy issues by fixing you! 67 00:04:15,047 --> 00:04:18,050 {\an8}Here, we offer fun things! 68 00:04:18,050 --> 00:04:20,427 Such as somewhat functional staff! 69 00:04:20,427 --> 00:04:22,638 And 24 hour Pest Control! 70 00:04:22,638 --> 00:04:26,058 Custom rooms, and just look at this tacky parlor! 71 00:04:26,058 --> 00:04:30,813 Enjoy riveting conversation with our singular resident. 72 00:04:30,813 --> 00:04:34,316 Wow! All this and more at the Hazbin Hotel! 73 00:04:34,900 --> 00:04:38,320 {\an8}Your last desperate attempt at salvation starts here. 74 00:04:39,446 --> 00:04:41,323 So, what'd ya' think? 75 00:04:41,949 --> 00:04:44,076 I'm sorry, what the fuck was that? 76 00:04:44,076 --> 00:04:46,495 Uh, yeah, one note... 77 00:04:46,495 --> 00:04:48,497 Alastor, I mean-- 78 00:04:48,497 --> 00:04:53,836 First off, thank you so much for making this seriously amazing, 79 00:04:53,836 --> 00:04:57,673 but um... maybe the tone is a bit... 80 00:04:58,382 --> 00:04:59,800 off? 81 00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:01,844 We want people to want to come here, 82 00:05:01,844 --> 00:05:05,264 this makes it look... ummm-- 83 00:05:05,764 --> 00:05:08,350 Bad. The word you're looking for is bad. 84 00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:10,853 Funny. I was going for hilarious! 85 00:05:10,853 --> 00:05:14,440 It didn't explain anything about how we're trying to save 86 00:05:14,440 --> 00:05:16,942 demons from extermination, which is the whole fucking point. 87 00:05:16,942 --> 00:05:19,611 Vaggie is right, Alastor. 88 00:05:19,611 --> 00:05:22,656 The commercial was to let Sinners know we are trying to help them. 89 00:05:22,656 --> 00:05:25,951 Well, my dear, I haven't been active in Hell for some time, 90 00:05:25,951 --> 00:05:28,871 and everyone remembers me from my radio show! 91 00:05:28,871 --> 00:05:32,416 The proper medium to express oneself! 92 00:05:32,416 --> 00:05:36,378 But you insisted on this: noisy picture box advertisement, 93 00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:37,713 So I had a little fun with it. 94 00:05:37,713 --> 00:05:39,423 Oh, fun. You had a little fun with it? 95 00:05:39,423 --> 00:05:41,467 Well, this is not what we want to represent us. 96 00:05:41,467 --> 00:05:43,093 When you showed up here a week ago, you told us 97 00:05:43,093 --> 00:05:45,054 you would help run this hotel! 98 00:05:45,054 --> 00:05:46,764 Instead, you're mocking us. 99 00:05:46,764 --> 00:05:48,766 Nobody's going to want to come to a place 100 00:05:48,766 --> 00:05:51,393 that a powerful Overlord like you thinks is a waste of time! 101 00:05:52,936 --> 00:05:54,563 What? 102 00:05:54,563 --> 00:05:56,732 If'n ya filmin' a commercial, 103 00:05:56,732 --> 00:05:59,401 can I suggest you take better advantage 104 00:05:59,401 --> 00:06:02,821 of the talented celebrity you have right here? 105 00:06:02,821 --> 00:06:07,034 - Angel, you're a porn star. - A famous porn star. 106 00:06:07,034 --> 00:06:12,790 I'll have the horniest sinners knockin' these walls down to get in. 107 00:06:12,790 --> 00:06:15,542 We are not filming a porn as a commercial. 108 00:06:15,542 --> 00:06:18,420 Why not? Sex sells, don't it? 109 00:06:18,420 --> 00:06:23,717 I swear if you film me goin' at it with mister fancy talk-creepy voice here, 110 00:06:23,717 --> 00:06:28,597 you'd be rollin' in participants willin' to stay at this tacky hotel. 111 00:06:28,597 --> 00:06:31,100 Haha! Never going to happen! 112 00:06:31,100 --> 00:06:36,105 Angel, I appreciate you wanting to use your special skills 113 00:06:36,105 --> 00:06:38,649 to, um, attract folks to the hotel, 114 00:06:38,649 --> 00:06:44,613 but-- I really don't want to exploit you, in that way! 115 00:06:44,613 --> 00:06:46,573 Oh, please, baby. 116 00:06:46,573 --> 00:06:50,202 This body was made to be exploited. 117 00:06:50,202 --> 00:06:54,123 I got the arms, I got the stamina, I got the legs. 118 00:06:54,123 --> 00:06:57,709 I got the lung capacity-- Oh-oh I got the legs, 119 00:06:57,709 --> 00:06:59,753 the gag reflex, the holes... 120 00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:01,713 the chest fluff everyone thinks are tits 121 00:07:01,713 --> 00:07:04,133 Uhhh, hold that thought. I'll be right back! 122 00:07:04,133 --> 00:07:06,635 I could keep goin' all night, baby. 123 00:07:09,638 --> 00:07:11,640 Hello? Dad? 124 00:07:11,640 --> 00:07:14,518 Hey, I have a question. 125 00:07:14,518 --> 00:07:16,520 If freaky face over there is so powerful, 126 00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:19,022 then why can't he just make people stay here? 127 00:07:19,022 --> 00:07:22,651 Oh, trust me, I can! 128 00:07:22,651 --> 00:07:24,653 Why do you think I'm here? 129 00:07:24,653 --> 00:07:27,156 You actually think I'd be cleaning bottles 130 00:07:27,156 --> 00:07:30,951 and listening to you fuck's bitch and moan all the time if he wasn't forcin' me? 131 00:07:30,951 --> 00:07:33,871 - I like being forced. - Keep that to yourself, Niff. 132 00:07:33,871 --> 00:07:37,166 What, you don't love being here with me, Whiskers? 133 00:07:37,166 --> 00:07:40,752 Call me "Whiskers" again and I'll jam that bottle down your throat. 134 00:07:40,752 --> 00:07:44,923 Kinky. C'mon keep talkin' dirty. 135 00:07:44,923 --> 00:07:49,511 Ugh, Angel, let Husk do his job. And no, we can't force sinners to stay here. 136 00:07:49,511 --> 00:07:51,180 They need to choose to. 137 00:07:51,180 --> 00:07:53,807 I'm choosing to be here, and I think it's all stupid. 138 00:07:54,266 --> 00:07:56,018 We're in Hell, Toots. 139 00:07:56,018 --> 00:07:57,686 That's kind of the end of the road, ain't it? 140 00:07:57,686 --> 00:07:59,188 Well, maybe it doesn't have to be. 141 00:07:59,188 --> 00:08:00,856 Just because nobody has made it out before 142 00:08:00,856 --> 00:08:02,691 doesn't mean it's not possible. 143 00:08:02,691 --> 00:08:06,695 Hey, whatever means I can keep crashin' here rent free. 144 00:08:06,695 --> 00:08:07,988 Crack is expensive. 145 00:08:08,655 --> 00:08:11,200 Yeah, I can totally. 146 00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:14,119 Yeah, I'll head over there right away... 147 00:08:14,703 --> 00:08:15,829 Okay. 148 00:08:16,205 --> 00:08:20,876 Hah! YES! YES!! Hahahaha!! 149 00:08:20,876 --> 00:08:23,003 - Vaggie! Holy shit! - Ahh! What?! 150 00:08:23,003 --> 00:08:24,213 Get over here! 151 00:08:26,757 --> 00:08:28,050 What's going on? 152 00:08:29,426 --> 00:08:30,928 My dad just called. He said that the leader 153 00:08:30,928 --> 00:08:32,596 of the Angel Army wants to meet. 154 00:08:32,596 --> 00:08:34,890 - He asked if I could go instead. - But... 155 00:08:36,558 --> 00:08:38,227 But-- But the extermination just happened. 156 00:08:38,769 --> 00:08:40,562 What could they want this soon after-- - 157 00:08:40,562 --> 00:08:44,233 ♪ I can do this. Somehow, I know it ♪ 158 00:08:44,233 --> 00:08:47,319 ♪ I'll get Heaven behind my plan ♪ 159 00:08:47,319 --> 00:08:52,574 - [Vaggie] Charlie, hold on. - ♪ There's just no way I could blow it ♪ 160 00:08:52,574 --> 00:08:57,204 - ♪ Not this once in a lifetime chance ♪ - It's just a meeting. 161 00:08:57,204 --> 00:09:00,624 ♪ To change their minds And touch their hearts ♪ 162 00:09:00,624 --> 00:09:03,126 ♪ Or whatever angels have ♪ 163 00:09:03,126 --> 00:09:04,336 This could be bad. 164 00:09:04,336 --> 00:09:05,754 ♪ Cheer up, Vaggie ♪ 165 00:09:05,754 --> 00:09:07,923 This could be swell ♪ 166 00:09:07,923 --> 00:09:11,051 ♪ Something tells me that today Will be a happy day ♪ 167 00:09:11,051 --> 00:09:12,803 ♪ In Hell ♪ 168 00:09:12,803 --> 00:09:14,304 Okay, but just don't... sing to them. 169 00:09:14,304 --> 00:09:15,764 That bitch is halfway down the street. 170 00:09:15,764 --> 00:09:17,099 - Is she-- - Oh, she's dancin'. 171 00:09:17,099 --> 00:09:18,600 Ugh, no. 172 00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:19,977 ♪ There's a warm fuzzy feeling ♪ 173 00:09:19,977 --> 00:09:22,062 ♪ That wafts through the air ♪ 174 00:09:22,062 --> 00:09:24,856 ♪ Every street so revealing It's hard not to stare ♪ 175 00:09:24,856 --> 00:09:28,360 ♪ It's a realm so appealing It beats anywhere ♪ 176 00:09:28,360 --> 00:09:31,780 ♪ If you don't mind The smell ♪ 177 00:09:31,780 --> 00:09:34,866 ♪ It's a happy day in Hell ♪ 178 00:09:34,866 --> 00:09:36,994 - Hi mister. - Go fuck yourself. 179 00:09:36,994 --> 00:09:38,662 ♪ There's an endless trash fire ♪ 180 00:09:38,662 --> 00:09:40,872 ♪ That's burning my soul ♪ 181 00:09:40,872 --> 00:09:43,292 ♪ Got a ton of barbed wire To shove in his hole ♪ 182 00:09:43,292 --> 00:09:45,627 ♪ Uh, excuse me ♪ ♪ - ♪ Doing what is required ♪ 183 00:09:45,627 --> 00:09:47,629 ♪ We all have our role ♪ 184 00:09:47,629 --> 00:09:50,007 ♪ I'm not doing well ♪ 185 00:09:50,007 --> 00:09:53,969 ♪ Another shitty day in Hell ♪ 186 00:09:53,969 --> 00:09:57,306 ♪ If I can show Them the dream I've dreamed ♪ 187 00:09:57,306 --> 00:09:59,391 ♪ That any soul can change ♪ 188 00:09:59,391 --> 00:10:01,768 ♪ Those angels minds Are hard to change ♪ 189 00:10:03,729 --> 00:10:06,356 ♪ Then they will know Everyone can be redeemed From the evil to the strange ♪ 190 00:10:06,356 --> 00:10:09,151 ♪ They're bloodthirsty and deranged ♪ 191 00:10:09,151 --> 00:10:14,156 ♪ I can hear all their stories The lost and displaced ♪ 192 00:10:14,156 --> 00:10:17,659 ♪ And I know that They're more of an acquired taste ♪ 193 00:10:17,659 --> 00:10:21,079 ♪ But if I open the door And I give them a place ♪ 194 00:10:21,079 --> 00:10:24,041 ♪ At my Hazbin Hotel ♪ 195 00:10:24,041 --> 00:10:27,669 ♪ It'll be a happy day in Hell ♪ 196 00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:34,426 ♪ From the porn studio Where the Cinephiles go ♪ 197 00:10:34,426 --> 00:10:37,387 ♪ To watch award winning Demon bukkake shows ♪ 198 00:10:37,387 --> 00:10:40,766 ♪ To the cannibal town Where they don't wear a frown 'cause ♪ 199 00:10:40,766 --> 00:10:43,935 ♪ Holy shit Ew, my gosh, why ♪ 200 00:10:43,935 --> 00:10:49,107 ♪ And I don't give a crow that His brains got in my eye ♪ 201 00:10:49,107 --> 00:10:54,279 ♪ Cause know I can spare them From Heaven's genocide ♪ 202 00:10:54,279 --> 00:10:57,032 - ♪ I can do this ♪ - ♪ There's an endless trash fire ♪ 203 00:10:57,032 --> 00:10:59,368 - ♪ I just know it ♪ - ♪ That's burning my soul ♪ 204 00:10:59,368 --> 00:11:01,203 - ♪ I'll get Heaven behind my plans ♪ - ♪ Ah ♪ 205 00:11:01,203 --> 00:11:04,039 ♪ There's just no way I could blow it ♪ 206 00:11:04,039 --> 00:11:05,916 ♪ I kinda like the barbed wire That's shoved in my hole ♪ 207 00:11:05,916 --> 00:11:08,001 ♪ Not this once in a lifetime chance ♪ 208 00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:09,920 ♪ To change their minds ♪ 209 00:11:09,920 --> 00:11:11,880 ♪ And touch my parts ♪ 210 00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:13,840 Oh... No, thank you. I'm just gonna... 211 00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:16,176 ♪ Fulfill my destiny ♪ 212 00:11:16,760 --> 00:11:18,053 Your loss bitch! 213 00:11:18,053 --> 00:11:20,889 ♪ I can already tell ♪ 214 00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:24,434 ♪ Today is gonna be a Fucking happy day ♪ 215 00:11:24,434 --> 00:11:33,402 ♪ In Hell ♪ 216 00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:36,405 Hello! 217 00:11:37,155 --> 00:11:38,323 Hello? 218 00:11:39,116 --> 00:11:43,787 Hello? 219 00:11:43,787 --> 00:11:45,914 Creepy... 220 00:11:49,084 --> 00:11:53,046 Oh, Okay. Also creepy. 221 00:11:56,258 --> 00:11:57,843 Uhh, hello? 222 00:11:58,885 --> 00:12:00,929 Is anyone here? 223 00:12:00,929 --> 00:12:02,681 - 'Sup. - Holy Shit! 224 00:12:02,931 --> 00:12:07,269 Hi, I'm Charlie. My dad asked me if I could meet you. 225 00:12:07,269 --> 00:12:11,106 - Yeah, I know. - Okay, well, it's nice to meet you. 226 00:12:11,106 --> 00:12:13,316 Totally. Nice to meet you, too. 227 00:12:13,316 --> 00:12:15,110 Ohh! 228 00:12:15,110 --> 00:12:18,113 Ha! I fucking got you. Did you fuckin' see that? 229 00:12:18,113 --> 00:12:22,159 - Good shit. - Uh, so wait, you aren't here? 230 00:12:22,159 --> 00:12:24,202 No, you think I'd come down there? 231 00:12:24,202 --> 00:12:26,872 No. I mean, I love the vibe, totally, I love your tunes. 232 00:12:26,872 --> 00:12:28,915 Pretty fuckin' hardcore, don't get me wrong. 233 00:12:28,915 --> 00:12:31,126 But, it's such a bummer, man. 234 00:12:31,126 --> 00:12:33,962 Everything down there's just so "eugh" ya know? 235 00:12:33,962 --> 00:12:35,547 Ew. 236 00:12:35,547 --> 00:12:39,968 Right. So I'm happy we got this opportunity to meet. 237 00:12:39,968 --> 00:12:43,889 There's a project I've been working on that I really want to talk to you about-- 238 00:12:43,889 --> 00:12:48,435 Hey, hey, hey, slow down. We got time. 239 00:12:48,435 --> 00:12:51,146 How about we get to know each other a little, mm? 240 00:12:51,146 --> 00:12:53,148 How about some lunch? You hungry? 241 00:12:53,148 --> 00:12:54,941 I got you! 242 00:12:54,941 --> 00:12:57,319 Here's my personal favourite. You'll love it. 243 00:12:57,319 --> 00:12:59,196 Uh, thanks! 244 00:12:59,196 --> 00:13:03,283 I got you again, bitch! 245 00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:05,994 Haha fuckin' hilarious! Haha! 246 00:13:07,829 --> 00:13:10,457 Okay, so Charlie is dealing with something very important, 247 00:13:10,457 --> 00:13:13,335 so while she's gone, we are making a new commercial. 248 00:13:13,335 --> 00:13:16,338 One that represents her vision and what we're doing here. 249 00:13:16,338 --> 00:13:19,841 So we need a camera. Alastor? 250 00:13:20,592 --> 00:13:22,344 A video camera. 251 00:13:22,344 --> 00:13:23,845 Hmm? 252 00:13:24,513 --> 00:13:26,515 All right, let's do this! 253 00:13:27,849 --> 00:13:29,184 And... 254 00:13:29,184 --> 00:13:30,977 Action. 255 00:13:30,977 --> 00:13:33,230 " Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel 256 00:13:33,230 --> 00:13:35,106 Can I help you with anything? " 257 00:13:35,106 --> 00:13:38,068 " I've been a bad boy. 258 00:13:38,068 --> 00:13:42,239 And I need a big, strong daddy to put me in my place ... 259 00:13:43,240 --> 00:13:45,200 On the path to redemption. " 260 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:50,163 -" Well, you come-- " - "Oh yes! " 261 00:13:50,372 --> 00:13:52,207 "...To the right place." 262 00:13:52,207 --> 00:13:54,167 Cut. Okay, Angel, 263 00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:56,378 I need you to be less horny, if possible. 264 00:13:56,378 --> 00:13:58,630 And Husk, can you maybe not have a script in front of your face? 265 00:13:58,630 --> 00:13:59,965 I ain't no act. 266 00:13:59,965 --> 00:14:02,217 I can't memorize this shit. 267 00:14:02,217 --> 00:14:06,429 Well, we could improv this shit. Baby cakes. Rawrrr. 268 00:14:07,889 --> 00:14:10,016 - Whoops. - Husk, Come on. 269 00:14:10,016 --> 00:14:12,894 So I was playin' this gig, and for some fuckin' reason 270 00:14:12,894 --> 00:14:14,896 this virtue chick was diggin' on the drummer, 271 00:14:14,896 --> 00:14:17,399 and it's like, do you know who I am? 272 00:14:17,399 --> 00:14:20,026 I'm fuckin' Adam. I'm the original dick! 273 00:14:20,026 --> 00:14:21,570 All dicks descend from me. 274 00:14:21,570 --> 00:14:24,573 You think you want drummer dick? No way, 275 00:14:24,573 --> 00:14:26,408 I'm the Dick-fuckin' master! 276 00:14:28,201 --> 00:14:30,495 So anyway, then we fucked, and it was awesome. 277 00:14:31,204 --> 00:14:32,372 What'd you do this weekend? 278 00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:34,082 Wait, your name is Adam? 279 00:14:34,082 --> 00:14:36,918 Like the first man Adam? That means you-- 280 00:14:36,918 --> 00:14:38,086 Ohhh... 281 00:14:39,337 --> 00:14:40,422 That explains so much. 282 00:14:40,422 --> 00:14:41,590 I know. I fucking rock. 283 00:14:41,590 --> 00:14:44,426 Well, Adam, sir. Mr. Adam, sir. 284 00:14:44,426 --> 00:14:46,261 Call me Dickmaster. 285 00:14:46,261 --> 00:14:48,013 Adam, you seem like a smart-- 286 00:14:48,013 --> 00:14:49,639 well, stand up guy. 287 00:14:49,639 --> 00:14:51,391 Uh-huh. 288 00:14:51,391 --> 00:14:53,310 And I know you are the leader of the angels. 289 00:14:53,310 --> 00:14:56,688 And you are a big thinker, a revolutionary, a-- a genius! 290 00:14:56,688 --> 00:14:58,565 I mean, your words, babe. 291 00:14:58,565 --> 00:15:00,984 Who would really love to put his name on something. 292 00:15:00,984 --> 00:15:02,569 Fucking love putting my name on shit. 293 00:15:02,569 --> 00:15:04,112 Shit's the best. 294 00:15:04,112 --> 00:15:06,072 It's a solution to our biggest problem! 295 00:15:06,072 --> 00:15:07,490 Oh, herpes. 296 00:15:07,490 --> 00:15:09,159 Yeah, that's a bitch. 297 00:15:09,159 --> 00:15:10,994 No! Our other biggest problem. 298 00:15:11,369 --> 00:15:14,623 Oh, uh... ugly people?... Math? 299 00:15:14,623 --> 00:15:16,458 Global warming? Nah, wait that's Earth's problem. 300 00:15:16,458 --> 00:15:18,376 Umm-- 301 00:15:18,376 --> 00:15:20,629 [Niffty] Hehehe. Stab. Stab. Stab. 302 00:15:20,629 --> 00:15:23,340 Alright Niffty. Niffty? Niffty! 303 00:15:23,340 --> 00:15:26,217 Your line is "We have the cleanest rooms." 304 00:15:26,217 --> 00:15:28,303 - Okay? - Got it. I'm ready. 305 00:15:28,303 --> 00:15:29,512 Action. 306 00:15:37,979 --> 00:15:39,981 Uhh... Cut. 307 00:15:39,981 --> 00:15:42,233 How was that? 308 00:15:42,233 --> 00:15:45,487 Well Niffty, you actually have to say the line. So let's roll again. 309 00:15:45,487 --> 00:15:47,322 - Okay. - Action. 310 00:15:51,993 --> 00:15:54,079 - You're doing great, Vagina. - Cut! 311 00:15:54,079 --> 00:15:57,332 Alright, um, maybe we can try to fix it in post. 312 00:15:57,332 --> 00:15:58,583 Do you even know what that means? 313 00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:00,126 I'll figure it out. 314 00:16:01,086 --> 00:16:02,671 Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel. 315 00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:08,635 Seems like you're having a bit of trouble there, hm? 316 00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:11,638 Ugh, este pendejo... Why are you even here? 317 00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:13,431 For the entertainment! 318 00:16:13,431 --> 00:16:16,559 I came here because I love seeing wasteful souls 319 00:16:16,559 --> 00:16:20,355 struggle to accomplish something meaningful and fail spectacularly. 320 00:16:20,355 --> 00:16:22,190 Like you are doing now! 321 00:16:22,190 --> 00:16:23,525 Good Job! 322 00:16:23,525 --> 00:16:25,110 And here is Alastor, 323 00:16:25,110 --> 00:16:26,653 the egocentric piece of shit that-- 324 00:16:29,364 --> 00:16:31,366 I wouldn't try that my dear. 325 00:16:31,366 --> 00:16:34,619 This face was made for radio! 326 00:16:35,704 --> 00:16:37,330 That's it! 327 00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:39,666 I don't care who or what you are. 328 00:16:39,666 --> 00:16:42,127 If you are staying here, you are going to make this work. 329 00:16:42,127 --> 00:16:44,337 Because it won't be so "entertaining" 330 00:16:44,337 --> 00:16:47,215 to watch over an empty hotel will it, shitass? 331 00:16:48,550 --> 00:16:51,219 Fair enough. I'll tell you what! 332 00:16:51,219 --> 00:16:52,679 - Let's make a deal. - Pft! 333 00:16:54,097 --> 00:16:56,558 Do you think I'm that stupid? Making a deal with a demon like you. 334 00:16:56,558 --> 00:17:00,186 Not for your soul, just a simple deal. 335 00:17:00,645 --> 00:17:04,691 I do this for you, and you never ask me to engage 336 00:17:04,691 --> 00:17:08,361 with this frivolous television technology ever again. 337 00:17:10,071 --> 00:17:13,825 Or... Charlie can come back to absolutely nothing! 338 00:17:13,825 --> 00:17:15,243 your choice. 339 00:17:16,494 --> 00:17:17,746 Fine. 340 00:17:25,378 --> 00:17:27,088 Now then. 341 00:17:33,762 --> 00:17:37,432 Alright, everyone! Let's make a fucking commercial. 342 00:17:38,224 --> 00:17:40,268 When you take her out for the fifth time 343 00:17:40,268 --> 00:17:42,228 and she still expects you to pay the check, but you're like, 344 00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:44,731 "Hey I thought you wanted equality" 345 00:17:44,731 --> 00:17:47,192 No! Our shared problem of 346 00:17:47,192 --> 00:17:48,234 overpopulation in Hell. 347 00:17:48,777 --> 00:17:52,489 Ohh! Well, that's not a problem! We got that covered. 348 00:17:52,489 --> 00:17:54,532 Lute, how many demons did you kill this year? 349 00:17:54,532 --> 00:17:56,618 Got a good 275 this year, sir. 350 00:17:56,618 --> 00:17:59,454 275? Whoa, Badass! 351 00:17:59,454 --> 00:18:01,790 Awesome job, danger tits! Pound it. 352 00:18:01,790 --> 00:18:03,833 Uh, no, not awesome. 353 00:18:03,833 --> 00:18:06,795 Those are my people, you know that, right? 354 00:18:06,795 --> 00:18:08,546 Ohhh, yeah... 355 00:18:09,130 --> 00:18:12,258 That must suck for you. Hahahaha. 356 00:18:12,258 --> 00:18:14,135 But these are souls. 357 00:18:14,469 --> 00:18:18,306 Human souls, just the same as the ones you have up in Heaven. 358 00:18:18,306 --> 00:18:19,808 They are not the same. 359 00:18:19,808 --> 00:18:21,810 They had their chance and they earned damnation. 360 00:18:21,810 --> 00:18:23,144 You're wrong. 361 00:18:23,144 --> 00:18:24,813 Sinners made mistakes, sure, 362 00:18:24,813 --> 00:18:26,731 but everyone makes mistakes. 363 00:18:26,731 --> 00:18:28,608 Angels don't make mistakes. 364 00:18:28,608 --> 00:18:30,151 You really think that? 365 00:18:30,151 --> 00:18:31,778 I know that. 366 00:18:31,778 --> 00:18:34,155 Yeah, I've never made a mistake in my fuckin' life 367 00:18:34,155 --> 00:18:35,698 The only reason you're still here 368 00:18:35,698 --> 00:18:38,243 is because Daddy gave you and your Hellborn-kind 369 00:18:38,243 --> 00:18:39,869 a pardon from an exorcist blade. 370 00:18:39,869 --> 00:18:43,248 How does that feel? To know how little you matter. 371 00:18:44,833 --> 00:18:47,836 Oops, almost out of time. Guess we should get into it-- 372 00:18:47,836 --> 00:18:49,295 Oh! Fuck!-- 373 00:18:51,172 --> 00:18:53,675 I've got a lot to get through. and not a lot of time. 374 00:18:53,675 --> 00:18:55,844 and I feel like you weren't really hearing me before, so here it goes. 375 00:18:55,844 --> 00:18:57,262 ♪ I know Hell's population ♪ 376 00:18:57,262 --> 00:18:58,471 ♪ Is out of control ♪ 377 00:18:58,471 --> 00:18:59,848 ♪ It's a bad situation ♪ 378 00:18:59,848 --> 00:19:01,432 It's taking a toll ♪ 379 00:19:01,432 --> 00:19:02,851 ♪ If we rehab these sinners ♪ 380 00:19:02,851 --> 00:19:04,269 ♪ And cleanse all their souls ♪ 381 00:19:04,269 --> 00:19:06,187 ♪ At my Hazbin Hotel ♪ 382 00:19:06,187 --> 00:19:08,356 Wait, I'm getting ahead of myself! Right! Extermination! 383 00:19:08,356 --> 00:19:10,441 ♪ I know you guys fly down Just to kill once a year ♪ 384 00:19:10,441 --> 00:19:12,610 ♪ And it must be annoying To schlep all the way here ♪ 385 00:19:12,610 --> 00:19:15,363 ♪ If they join you in Heaven That trip disappears ♪ 386 00:19:15,363 --> 00:19:17,323 ♪ you can wave that chore farewell ♪ 387 00:19:17,323 --> 00:19:18,908 ♪ It'll be a happy day in-- ♪ 388 00:19:18,908 --> 00:19:20,493 ♪ Let me stop you right there 389 00:19:20,493 --> 00:19:22,579 ♪ Save us all precious time ♪ 390 00:19:22,579 --> 00:19:25,331 ♪ If what you're suggesting Is letting them climb ♪ 391 00:19:25,331 --> 00:19:29,377 ♪ Up the ladder oh they'd Rather cross the Pearly Gates ♪ 392 00:19:29,377 --> 00:19:31,754 ♪ Sorry, sweetie but there's no Defyin' their fates ♪ 393 00:19:31,754 --> 00:19:35,341 ♪ 'Cause Hell is forever Whether you like it or not ♪ 394 00:19:35,341 --> 00:19:38,887 ♪ Had their chance to behave Better now they boil in the pot ♪ 395 00:19:38,887 --> 00:19:43,224 ♪ 'Cause the rules are black & White There's no use in tryin' To fight it ♪ 396 00:19:43,224 --> 00:19:46,352 ♪ They're burnin' for their Lives Until we kill 'em again ♪ 397 00:19:46,352 --> 00:19:48,563 Okay, but-- - ♪ Let's just try to chillax babe ♪ 398 00:19:48,563 --> 00:19:49,981 - ♪ You're wasting your breath ♪ - Hehe... 399 00:19:49,981 --> 00:19:51,691 ♪ Did I hear you imply ♪ 400 00:19:51,691 --> 00:19:53,401 ♪ That they don't deserve death ♪ 401 00:19:53,401 --> 00:19:54,986 ♪ Are they winners, Are they Sinners 402 00:19:54,986 --> 00:19:56,237 'Cause it's cut and dry ♪ 403 00:19:56,571 --> 00:19:58,364 Well actually if you take a look-- 404 00:19:58,364 --> 00:20:00,909 ♪ Fair is fair, an eye for an eye ♪ 405 00:20:00,909 --> 00:20:07,332 ♪ And when all's said and done There's the question of fun ♪ 406 00:20:07,332 --> 00:20:10,919 ♪ And for those of us with Divine ordainment ♪ 407 00:20:10,919 --> 00:20:14,589 ♪ Extermination is Entertainment ♪ 408 00:20:14,589 --> 00:20:17,842 ♪ Guitar solo, fuck yeah ♪ 409 00:20:17,842 --> 00:20:21,262 Ugh... 410 00:20:21,262 --> 00:20:22,639 ♪ Hell is forever ♪ 411 00:20:22,639 --> 00:20:24,474 ♪ Whether you like it or not ♪ 412 00:20:24,474 --> 00:20:26,434 ♪ Had their chance to behave better ♪ 413 00:20:26,434 --> 00:20:28,353 ♪ Now they boil in the pot ♪ 414 00:20:28,353 --> 00:20:29,938 ♪ 'Cause the rules Are black & white ♪ 415 00:20:29,938 --> 00:20:31,773 There's no use in tryin' To fight it ♪ 416 00:20:31,773 --> 00:20:33,274 ♪ They're burnin' for their Lives ♪ 417 00:20:33,274 --> 00:20:34,984 ♪ Until we kill 'em again ♪ 418 00:20:34,984 --> 00:20:36,694 ♪ Fuckin' Hell is forever ♪ 419 00:20:36,694 --> 00:20:38,488 ♪ And it's meant To suck a lot ♪ 420 00:20:38,488 --> 00:20:39,906 ♪ So give up Your dumb endeavor ♪ 421 00:20:39,906 --> 00:20:42,742 ♪ Cause you don't have a shot ♪ 422 00:20:42,742 --> 00:20:45,370 ♪ Long as I've got your Attention, I guess I should Probably mention ♪ 423 00:20:45,370 --> 00:20:48,706 ♪ That we've made the Determination ♪ 424 00:20:48,706 --> 00:20:52,669 - ♪ To move up the next Extermination ♪ - What! 425 00:20:52,669 --> 00:20:55,546 ♪ Can't wait a whole year to Slaughter those little cunts ♪ 426 00:20:55,546 --> 00:20:59,884 ♪ I know it's just been a week But we'll be back in six months ♪ 427 00:20:59,884 --> 00:21:02,470 Um, wait, didn't you-- 428 00:21:05,056 --> 00:21:06,933 Awh, shit! 429 00:21:10,478 --> 00:21:11,813 Charlie. 430 00:21:11,813 --> 00:21:13,690 How did it go? Did they listen? 431 00:21:13,690 --> 00:21:17,902 Oh, uh... They sure did... hear it! But, um... 432 00:21:17,902 --> 00:21:20,989 Oh! Come here. We have something exciting to show you! 433 00:21:22,865 --> 00:21:24,993 Alastor pulled some strings, and it's about to air. 434 00:21:24,993 --> 00:21:27,996 I pulled a few limbs too! Hahaha! 435 00:21:28,663 --> 00:21:30,540 Wait? The commercial? 436 00:21:30,540 --> 00:21:32,667 You all made a new one? 437 00:21:32,667 --> 00:21:35,753 Yeah, one of my better performances, if I do say so myself. 438 00:21:36,004 --> 00:21:38,756 That's... that's amazing. 439 00:21:38,756 --> 00:21:40,466 Shush, it's starting! 440 00:21:40,466 --> 00:21:43,011 Welcome to the Hazbin Hot-- 441 00:21:46,097 --> 00:21:48,349 Breaking news in Hell today! 442 00:21:48,349 --> 00:21:50,560 We have just received word from the Heaven Embassy 443 00:21:50,560 --> 00:21:54,605 that the next extermination is happening sooner than ever before. 444 00:21:54,605 --> 00:21:58,484 {\an8}- Do you know what that means Tom? - No. what does that mean, Katie? 445 00:21:58,484 --> 00:22:00,528 It means we are all royally fucked. 446 00:22:03,740 --> 00:22:06,576 Wait... What? Why?! 447 00:22:12,790 --> 00:22:15,835 We found the body, sir. 448 00:22:15,835 --> 00:22:19,547 They've never managed to kill one of us before. 449 00:22:19,797 --> 00:22:22,550 We should just go down there now and destroy them. 450 00:22:22,550 --> 00:22:25,136 No, no. We can't risk them catching on. 451 00:22:25,136 --> 00:22:27,597 But don't worry, when we come back, 452 00:22:27,597 --> 00:22:31,684 there won't be a demon left alive to pull a stunt like this again!